The Royals in 2012

I wonder if they've officially changed the format for next years mlb playoffs to add the play in game. I'd love to predict the Royals making an appearance in this game for next season. Maybe 2012 will be a magical year for KC. All-Star Game and a return to the playoffs would be so awesome. Of course, this is just me and my post-Chiefs relevance optimisim for the coming baseball season. I'm already looking forward to spring training and Ned Yost anouncing the starting rotation. Sanchez, Chen, Hochevar, Paulino and who? Door is closing on free agency but with Soria available for trade, another starter could be in the mix. Doubt it though. Maybe Duffy, Teaford, or even Aaron Crow. We'll see, I guess. I also want our middle infield to turn heads all season. Giovatella and Escobar will be real fun to watch turn two. Gotta work on getting opening day tickets some how.


Post-Wipe Note: I've been on vacation over the last week and decided not to poost while at my mom's house. Now that I'm back, I'll return to poosting as regularly as my bowels dictate.

New Pooster! Heather.

I love christmas lights. You can see our christmas lights out of our bathroom window. Its a very colorful bathroom experience. The bathroom window is like frosted stones so the lights give it a stained glass feel.  I absolutely love it.

Sprint Center

I keep wondering if people would be more inclined to support an NHL team or an NBA team at Sprint center here in KC. I'm thinking the NBA team would have to be really good before anyone went to the games. I think hockey would have enough general fans excited for the opportunity to see real hockey that they would support it even if the team wasn't so great. I mean, if the Wizards (or whatever they are called now a days) can sell out a soccer game, hockey is sure to do the same. Personally, hockey doesn't do anything for me. Of course, I've never seen an NHL game live and minor league hockey isn't any fun unless there are $1 beers involved. Even the fights in hockey seem contrived. Yeah, I've decided I back an NBA team for Kansas City. I know it won't happen though.

Petey

For some reason, i felt the urge to listen to the Petey Pablo song "Raise Up" today. I got on YouTube and relived 2001 for about four minutes. Then I proceeded to post the link on a bunch of people's Facebook walls. Then I got to thinking. I wonder where Petey is today; so I checked his Wikipedia page. Turns out, Petey's real name is Moses Mortimer Barrett III. I think he should have stuck with that name. I mean, imagine the video if Petey, rather, Moses parting the red sea by twisting his shirt around his head like a helicopter. It's like he's getting North Carolinians to raise up like the Israelites against Pharoh. That type of biblical imagery would put Matisyahu to shame. Oh, and on September 11th of last year, Moses was arrested for trying to bring a gun on a plane. ON 9/11!!! What a dumb ass. 

Siesta

Got a late nap today. Seemed like the morning disappeared with grocery shopping and pie baking and homework doing. Then we had a family Christmas party for Jen's dads side. By the time I got to look at my watch, it was 3:15 and we were just getting the kids down for a nap. 90 minutes later and I'm up, packing a cooler for an evening with friends. It's amazing how quickly eight hours goes when you aren't sitting in a cubical all day. Even pooping feels like I'm wasting time. Maybe that's why I end up skipping days on the weekend.

Friday Alone

So my wife is going out with friends tonight so I'll be at home alone after the kids to to sleep. I can't think of anything to do with myself. Maybe I'll play Tiger Woods on the Wii. I'll probably watch Netflix documentaries though. Now the question is to get beer or not. I'm old enough where drinking alone doesn't mean I have a problem, it just means there is no one else to hang out with. I might just be justifying bad behavior though. I guess ill get some beer just in case. Can't go anywhere after the kids are asleep and if I want delivery beer, I'll have to buy $25 worth and that's way more than I need.

Hot Dogs

If I had to eat one thing for the rest of my life, it would be Nathans hot dogs with mustard and chopped onions. They are so good. I had hot dogs for lunch today. A buddy at work got a Groupon. Pretty good deal. 10 hot dogs for $19 at New York Dawg Pound in OPKS. I like the place well enough but when I go there, I feel like they are selling me something that they aren't quite delivering. I can't put my finger on what it is though. Maybe its the terrible mural and fake graffiti. Also, I thought Pepsi wasn't the right choice of beverage for a hot dog place. Hot dogs are All-American and when I think American beverages, I think Coke. That's just me though. 


Post-wipe note: Since I'm linking this to urban spoon, I feel the need to point out that I got the Bulldawg (Chili-Cheese Dog) and the Buttercup (Chicago Dog) and both were delicious. 

Bourbon Barrel Quad (BBQ)

I feel like a iPhone fanboy. This morning, I'm going to line up outside of a liquor store so I can buy a limited release beer, Boulevard's Bourbon Barrel Quad. Of course, beer is way better than some outdated phone though. My step-Todd is a huge fan of this one. I'll add this buy to the piles of stuff I've got to bring to AZ. I've got a whole cooler of cookie dough, a case of 4 pack boulevard smokestack beers and now more beer. I hope this stuff is good. Maybe I'll get on Reddit and use one on /r/beertrade to get some Alaskan Amber.


Post-Wipe Note: Aren't (What a weird word when it's written) you getting the feel of just how regular I am? One poost a day. Like clockwork. I don't know why, but I always end up skipping a day on the weekends. Maybe it's the beer.

Gas Station

Argh. I had to stop at a gas station to poop. I thought this was a nice looking Circle K that would probably have a nice bathroom but when I walk in and head towards the back, I notice the sign that says key available at the register. I have to say, this is the first time I've had to go get a bathroom key at a gas station when the bathroom was inside. Now, the bathroom is clean enough. Probably because they lock it. I am staring at a urinal that's about two feet away, though. That's not very pleasant. The women's room didn't have a sign. I find that odd from all of the horror stories I've heard about women's behavior in public toilets. Hovering should be outlawed.

Eggs

Eggs Florentine made by the Egg Master!

Last night, we had eggs florentine for dinner. I also made eggs and bacon for breakfast this morning. Both times, I cooked the eggs perfectly. I've always been hit or miss with poaching eggs and frying them, I almost always break at least one yolk. The poached eggs from last night were perfectly formed and done just to the point that the inside was starting to goo up. Doesn't slimy appetizing bigot was perfect. This morning, none of the yolks broke and they were all runny with no uncooked white goo around them. You know cooking something is tricky when "goo" is either an intended result or an unintended disaster. I am the egg master.

Barber Shop Talk

Got a haircut this morning and my barber used to ne on the city council. He said he raised $15 k for his city council campaign. That is as much money as a councilperson gets paid by the city annually. Money really is what makes politics move. Ridiculous. The more I think about it, the more turned off I get. Of course, part of the blame goes to lazy voters. If people didn't vote for the person with the most lawn signs, the money to make lawn signs wouldn't be needed.

Bruno Mars- Jes

I've been listening to a lot of pop music on the radio since I moved to Georgia. That dude Bruno Mars sounds a lot like Michael Jackson. When I first heard him I thought it was some MJ song that I hadn't heard before. I wonder what that guy looks like. Probably like a douche. He probably has a bleached orange mini-fro and wears a lot of leather jackets and tribal style jewelry. That's just a guess though, I've never seen him before.

Running

I have all but committed to running for congress. Just looking into entering the world of politics has me feeling gross. The sheer volume of money involved in the process is staggering. I wonder if my approach will be at all effective. I just want to make a website, Facebook and Twitter accounts and get input from the voters. If I'm volunteering to be a representative of these people, wouldnt it make sense to invite their concerns and opinions BEFORE building a platform on which to run? We'll see, I guess. Look for Mann4MO.com soon.

New Pooster! Jes.

Ok I'm gonna try this...
You know what's disgusting?  One of my cousins leaves their tooth brush on a shelf in the shower below waist height.  God knows what kinda nasty stuff gets on it when I'm washing my various parts. I'm sure it falls on the floor a lot too.  Ok time to wipe.

Campari

I need to go buy some Campari. Putting that stuff in your beer ensures that you are going to have a wild ass time. I just don't know what need to drink with it. I've only had it in Red Stripe while I was in Jamaica but it seems like a waste to spend $8 on a six pack and then put bitter liqueur in it. Maybe I should carry it around for when people order me shitty beer. Or I could start buying shitty beer myself to put it in. If you're drinking with me any time soon, you better believe I'm making you put some Campari in your beer.

Hotel for Dogs

So, I'm trying to plan out my trip to Phoenix to visit my mom for Christmas. Starred looking for hotels that would allow dogs around Albuquerque, NM. Found a lot of cheap places to stay on some pet friendly hotel finder site. Anyone ever stay at an Econo Lodge? It was $47 a night for the room but $25 per pet. Basically, it costs more for my dogs to stay than it will be for the rest of my family. If that's the case, I'm gonna need some pillows and blankets for Lily and Jake to use.

Older and Wiser?

I must be getting older. This morning, there was a ton of traffic coming into work. There was a bit of snow on the ground and ice patches near intersections. Usually, when it takes me 90 minutes to go 17 miles, I get annoyed and complain. This morning, however, I found myself thinking about how good it was that everyone had decided to be careful and not push it for the sake of saving a few minutes. I only saw one accident on the way in and there didn't seem to be any injury or damage in that case. I think I'll still be annoyed when KC comes to a crawl each time it rains though. That's just ridiculous.

Ass is Ass

Leon from "Curb Your Enthusiasm" has to be one of the greatest characters on tv in a decade. When the Blacks moved out, I was ecstatic that Leon stuck around. I'm actually really surprised that the actor that plays him isn't in anything else. I've seen him recently in a commercial but the guy has to be funny enough to carry his own show. He is probably a stand up comedian. If he is ever in Kansas City, I'm going to see him. I don't even care I'd his act is nothing like Leon. You can't be that character without being funny as hell. Gonna look him up when I'm done so I don't miss him coming to town. "You get in that ass, Larry!"


[Post wipe note: The guy's name is JB Smoove and he is a comedian.]

ABITA Amber

This is the first beer from Abita that I haven't liked. It has no personality. Crystal clear. Barely amber in color. I was really disappointed when I poured it. Of course, every beer that says "Amber" on the label, I compare to one of my all time favorites, Alaskan Amber. Nothing holds a candle to it. I really wish they distributed here in Kansas City. Gomers in LS had an empty bottle sitting on top of one of their coolers. They don't well it though. What a tease. In fact, its the reason I tries out Abitas amber. Boulevard's is terrible too, BTW.

Shopping

I can't tell if I'm pooping more because I want to poost more or because I'm full of shit. Either way, I guess the second statement is true. Good news is I'm at work so I'm getting paid to poop. The bad news is that my wife is using the miracle of picture messaging to make me help her shop for dresses. Good thing I have an unlimited plan. I wonder if my wife plans on spending my Christmas party with her arm extended and her phone in her hand because she looks great in these dresses that way.

Erykah Badu

What ever happened to Erykah Badu and what was she hiding in that head piece she used to wear? I bet she could carry a baby up there, no problem. Maybe she didn't have a baby sitter on the day it was time to shoot her first video so she just wrapped her baby up and put it on her head. Then the record company saw it and thought it really helped her "Roots" identity so they made her wear it all of the time. Or maybe it was a lunch box. I wouldn't put my thermos or any perishables in there though because you would need an ice pack and then your head would get cold.

Fries

Why are Burger King and Wendy's so caught up on changing their fries and shit? BK has had 10 different styles of fries in as many years. And Wendy's is trying to be a fast casual restaurant for some reason. Why can't you just stick to what you do? Just because you half wrap your burgers and put them in a box doesn't make you a better place to eat. And when they say they have jucier burgers, they mean greasier. They are hotter though. Be careful when ordering the best thing at Wendy's, BTW. The Spicy Chicken meal is no longer the #6. It's now the 7. The 6 is some hamburger named after George Bush. I don't even think the spicy chicken is the same any more. If so, fuck Wendy's. I'll never eat there again.

Survivor

I think that Cochran should have secured the bottom three (him, Edna, Rick) and then tried to sway Coach to vote out whoever he perceived as four(probably Brandon, if not Albert). They could have each told Coach that he was their final two and secured his spot in his mind. Of course they could just vote him out the next tribal.

Initial brainstorm

I had a great idea. Just type whatever you think about while sitting on the toilet. Maybe ill turn it into a blog. First, think of a clever name for it. I could name the entries by date and time and tag them with poop volume and consistiency. Taking pictures might go overboard. I wish I could finish this poop so I could go home. Oh, and time spent on the toilet. That's important information. I'll gain a few weeks of entries before I start the blog. Then ill start posting with little editing. Or none at all. Once you flush, them words gotta get posted. No, editing is probably best if typing on a phone. Great use of evernote! Poop location too. That will be important. Got to hold off on telling anyone about this great idea.